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ChangingMinds Blog! > Blog Archive > 14-Feb-16


Sunday 14-February-16

Valentine's Day, Love, Hope and Luck

Happy Valentine's Day, everyone. I hope you got the card you want and the love that comes with it.

Named after the Christian saint Valentinus, February 14th has long been a day for lovers and hopefuls to declare their affections for one another. Unless you already have a partner, it's also very much a day of hope, either that the person who you sent a card will love you back, or that you get a card from someone special. There's a lot of hope in love, and Valentine's Day can sometimes give it the nudge that is needed.

In fact finding the right partner has a lot to do with luck. Studies of identical twins have shown many similar aspects of their lives, but one thing that is different is the type of person that they marry. This shows how similar people choose partners less from a fixed perfect ideal and more from whoever is available when they are looking. Even if we think we have found the one perfect partner, the reality is that there are many people out there with whom we could get on just fine.

The secret of good relationships is more than love. As with much of life, it also takes hard work and luck. You have to work to attract a partner, then you have to work to keep them. And along the way, despite your work, bad luck can happen and things can go wrong. But, by and large, the harder you work, the luckier you get. And the more love you give, the more love you get.

Me? I got lucky many years ago. I met my wife at University and we're still very much in love. And we still both work on staying that way. The rest of life has gone up and down, but Eleri has been a constant for over forty years. I know that I'm still a very lucky chap.

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